The Family Car

 

Last week, Steve & I took one more giant step into the world of parenthood.  We'd already converted our spare bedroom into a nursery and given our living room up to the ever- increasing pile of toys (all of which, inexplicably, make noise).  We'd accepted the fact that our days of sleeping late and watching whatever we want on TV are over.   Having a baby has changed almost every facet of our lives - from the way we relate to each other to the way we view the world around us.  Last week, we gave away that last little remnant of our independent, pre-parent days.  Yep - we traded Steve's Ford F-150 truck in for a Honda minivan.

 

We knew that eventually we were going to have to do something about our vehicle situation - at least by the time we have our second child.   Neither my Civic nor the truck were designed to carry two adults, two kids in carseats, and all of the stuff that goes along with those two kids.  At Christmas, we decided to drive the truck to visit family because they're just wasn't room in the car for everything - Gracie's pack-n-play, her stroller, all her clothes, our clothes, Christmas presents, the kitchen sink......We loaded as much as we could in the cab of the truck, stuffed the rest of it in the bed, and prayed it wouldn't rain.  It didn't rain - it snowed!  Luckily, Steve had a tarp and nothing was messed up, but we could both see the writing on the wall.  So, the idea of getting a vehicle that was a little more practical for a growing family had been swirling around in my head.  The space issue was compounded by the gas issue.  There are months when we spent more at the pump than we sent to the bank to pay for the vehicle.  That's like paying more a month for home owner's insurance than you do for the mortgage payment - oh yeah we do practically do that, too (oh, the joys of living in Florida after four hurricanes!)

 

When we took the Civic to be serviced last week and we saw a pre-owned (don't you love car dealers' euphemisms these days) Odyssey, I took it as a sign.  I also took it as a sign that we had both the car and truck with us (we'd driven the truck to pick up the car). I mean, it would have been a lot more difficult to trade the truck in if it was at home, now wouldn't it?  Of course, I take everything as a sign, so I looked to Steve to see what he thought.  "It's up to you," he said and shrugged and then agreed to test drive the thing while Gracie and I waited in the parking lot.  When he came back 30 minutes later, I knew he was hooked.  I was picturing all the room we'd have for trips and how easy it would be to get Gracie in and out of her seat - I was hooked, too.  I made a ridiculous statement to the saleswoman about how we'd only buy it if they took the truck as a trade and paid off the car so we'd only have one car payment.  It never dawned on me that they would actually go for it - I had forgotten that car dealerships these days are practically begging people to take cars - I mean 0.00% financing, come on! 

 

So, the push and pull of buying a car began.  There's a reason they call these places dealerships.  They deal - they don't sell - and anyone who thinks buying a car is a simple sell has never bought a car.   And anyone who was insane enough to take a tired and hungry toddler with them to a car deal knows that the wheeling and dealing is hardly made easier by having a fifteen-month-old tagging along.  Gracie split her time between stealing the pens that the saleswoman brought to the table and trying to alternately write on the cloth chairs or poke her own eye out and running through the showroom.  She was fascinated with the cars - their headlights, the shiny paint, the tires.  I managed to keep her from scratching the paint with her stolen pin or climbing into one of the $35,000 sports cars with her mushed up animal cracker hands, but it was close!

 

Finally, we got everything worked out in a way that was acceptable to both the dealer and us.  By this time, it was closing in on Gracie's bedtime and like many toddlers, the more tired she gets, the wilder she gets.  So, to spare us from a lawsuit and the dealership from the pain of having to explain to their insurance company whey they let a toddler drive one of their cars through a plate glass window, I agreed to go ahead and take Gracie home and let Steve finish the paperwork and drive the van home.  I'm sure I saw tears of relief in the saleswoman's eyes. 

 

As I walked out into the warm evening air, an old friend caught my eye.  There, sparkling in the fading light was Steve's black truck.  Suddenly, I was a little sad.  Steve had the truck when we met.  Its door was the one he held open for me on our first date.  It was what we drove the day we went to pick my engagement ring out.  When Steve was traveling out of town, it was that truck that I waited to see pull up in our driveway.  It was the truck that we drove away from our wedding reception, our first ride as husband and wife.  After we were first married, when I'd turn the corner onto our street, my heart would skip a beat when I'd see that truck, knowing that the love of my life was home.  Just then, the second love of my life, the little imp with a new car fetish, smiled and waved back at her daddy on the other side of the plate glass.  I saw him standing there and knew he had to be a little sad, too.  He was giving up a piece of himself, but he was doing it to make life easier for Gracie and me.  To me, his truck was always an outward symbol of what a strong man he was - a strong reliable vehicle for a strong reliable man. 

 

I know that there are people who will tell you that they will NEVER drive a van and men who will tell you that's it not manly for a man to drive a van.  But, I'm here to tell you there's nothing more manly in the world than a man who will do anything for his family.  Every time I look at our new van, I'm reminded of what a wonderful, strong, loving husband I have and what a wonderful father Gracie is blessed to have.